Sunday 6 April 2008

Back... For Good?

Back in the good ol' days, when life was about as interesting as AS physics, I used to blog all the time about how mind-numbingly boring life was, how difficult my exams were, what I had for breakfast etc. Tedious twaddle like that. Now life is fast-paced and crazy - filled with girls, raves and new experiences. Fascinating stuff that would have had literally tens of people tuning into my blog.

Alas, the very topics that would have increased my readership were also the reasons I have not updated, because I was too busy dealing with them rather than writing about them. And you what? That just isn't fair on you, my dear loyal fans. I knew you would be distraught at my disappearance, and that's what made me return. It was you that brought me back from the abyss.

So what exactly happened in the time I was gone? Writing in detail about it all would take years, so I'll summarise:

I got a Muslim girlfriend. I know, you're probably asking yourself, surely that's an oxymoron? Muslims and dating don't mix! I had to learn that the hard way... When three months into our tomfoolery her parents found out and she was nearly pulled out of school (but that thankfully resolved itself. However, we are no longer going out). All I wanted was a shallow popcorn-movies-gossip sorta relationship, but it turned into something so much more and she only had to go and fall in love with me (she's only human...). So dealing with this complicated mess has been quite time consuming.

The whole academic side has intensified, with only one month to go before the critically important A-level exams, which will have a massive impact on what university I want to go to. Since I'm still holding onto the dream of Oxbridge, I've been working harder, doing more medical work experience, and generally pushing myself so that my chances are optimised. I'm just hoping I won't burn out before exams...

All my friends have turned into whiny neurotic girl-chasing emos like myself. Dealing with the bitchery and social politics is a pain. How I long to be sixteen again...

Oh, and I'm seventeen now. Actually closer to eighteen. The gimmick of being a young blogger is fading...

Anyway, hopefully this is a return-to-form post. I'll try and write regularly in the run-up to University, but there's no guarantees.

Sunday 2 March 2008

Failing At Life

They said Sixth Form would be exciting, that it would be fun. Oh it started like that, but life problems have been mounting every since my last post and have now reached a climax.

To cut a long story short:

I fancied a girl, I asked out girl and got dealt a bitter dose of humiliation, over time girl develops strong feelings for me and we unofficially start "seeing" each other. Her parents found out (did I mention they were strict Muslims?) and are going to pull her out of the school and basically ruin her life.

I became complacent with my academia and started slipping. When mocks came I achieved very low marks, which alerted all the teachers because I have "Oxbridge potential". Now important A-level module marks are coming out next week and I fear I have underachieved. I know grades aren't everything, but when you come from an Asian background, they really are everything. If I don't meet expectations (which are unbelievable high) I may suffer a fate similar to my Muslim girlfriend.

I am incredibly stressed and worried (for me and her) and it's all so overwhelming.

And there are lots of other small niggly insignificant problems which I shan't mention. All this time I kept thinking to myself: "my life is riveting. If only I was blogging it or writing a book about my experiences". How ironic that when my life was tedious I blogged so often, but when it suddenly became interesting I couldn't find the time...

It seems in my darkest hour, I have returned to my blog.

I hope you understand if I go "on hiatus" for awhile. If something exceptional or extraordinary happens I'll make sure to write, but don't expect me back anytime soon.